Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Emberly's newborn portraits

Here's a peek at Emberly's newborn portraits that I took! You can see more on my photo blog :)

Saturday, April 2, 2011

The birth of Emberly

I've had many of you ask about Emberly's birth... it's taken me a week to recoup, but I think I'm officially ready to share my story.... if I haven't forgotten most of it!
It all started late Friday night, or I guess I should say early Saturday morning. Contractions came on and they came on strong! To be honest, I can't even remember what they felt like. I think my mind is trying to push the pain out of my memory. But I woke up to the contractions being 2.5 min apart around 1 am. So we waited it out a little bit until I couldn't stand the pain anymore. Then we headed to the hospital. They strapped a ton of wires and monitors to me and my belly and after an hour of monitoring my contractions, they sent me home dilated at a 3. I was so upset because of how much pain I was in. It was my back that hurt the most. So they gave me a shot and told me to come back once it wears off and the pain is back. Around 7 am I couldn't sleep anymore and started pacing the hallway. This is when my mom came up stairs and said, it's time to go! We were off once again to the hospital and were admitted right away. Once again I was strapped in to a bunch of machines and was told I was now dilated to a 6.5 and they broke my water. I had plans on delivering naturally, but my back was hurting me SO bad. This is when I found out that our little girl was posterior, which causes horrific back labor. The anesthesiologist came in to give me my epidural, except he said my back seemed to be a little different and he wasn't too happy with how it all turned out. We gave it a chance though. Random parts of my body went numb, but not the important areas. With an epidural you're legs should feel like jello. He asked if I could move my leg and in response I lifted up my legs and shook them around (not the answer he was hoping for).  After a while I started feeling horrible pains again, this is when the anesthesiologist decided he was going to give me the epidural AGAIN. The first time wasn't too bad, but I cried and cried while he put the second one it. After that my legs did start going numb and the pain subsided. This is where the fun began. It was time for active labor! By the time I was supposed to start pushing, the epidural wore off AGAIN. I could feel everything. Usually the nurses and Dr have to tell you when you have a contraction coming on so you can push. I was the one that said when one was coming and when I was ready to push. Although pushing was my least favorite part. I was exhausted and yelled random things like "I want grape juice" which you're not allowed to have. All you get is ice chips. So they gave me ice chips with grape flavoring, and I spit that out and told them to take it away. At one point I even yelled at the nurse to get out. My sister thought I was talking to her, but the nurse kept checking to see if the baby was crowning and I got so sick of her fingers being inside of me. I think I scared her a little bit.. she was hesitant to touch me again for a while.  To be quite frank, giving birth was the most painful experience I've ever dealt with. Obviously had my epidural worked, or if I didn't have back labor it would have been as lovely and beautiful as I hear it can be. After an hour of pushing, screaming and almost hyperventilating little Emberly entered into the world on March 26th at 1:36 pm weighing in at 7 lbs 15 oz and 20 in long. Her poor face was so swollen from being in posterior position, but she was beautiful. Perfect in every way.
After delivery they headed me to the recovery room where I was to stay for 2 nights. The first night wasn't bad at all. I had a wonderful nurse to help me out and show me the ropes. She would even take Emberly out of the room so I could sleep and bring her back when it was time to nurse. Ian was fabulous and stayed at the hospital with me. He changed all of her diapers since I was practically stuck in bed. No one told me how horrible your body is after labor. I wont go into details, but it's not pretty and it's very painful. Which I guess I should have known since I just delivered a child through my lovely lady parts. Anyway, moving on. The next night wasn't so fabulous. My nurse wasn't as amazing, Emberly decided she didn't want to breast feed anymore and the realization of everything that just happened hit me. I was so emotional and begged the nurse to take Emberly out of the room so we could sleep, but she insisted on me feeding her first, which was the issue to begin with. This is when we tried formula. BIG mistake. It just gave her an upset tummy and made my night even worse. By the time morning came we found out that she had jaundice and needed to be put under bili rubin lights. That was my braking point. I started crying hysterically, just in time for my Dr to come in and check up on us. He talked us through everything then child services came in. They had to talk with me about baby blues and postpartum depression. He was an awesome man and made me feel so much better. Finally after everyone in the world came in to check on us we were able to go home. It's been SO wonderful being home! Even if Emberly has needed to be on a bili pad for the past 5 days. Her levels have finally gone down so now we can start to feel somewhat normal not having to worry about her laying on this pad day and night. Now that my milk has finally come in, Emberly is nursing fabulously. The first few nights she's had screaming fits between 10 pm to 2 am, but last night she did wonderfully!
I'm sure at one point I had a lot more to say about the whole delivery process, but I think my mind has started to push it all out of my memory. Having a daughter is amazing.. I love her with all my heart! Plus she is absolutely beautiful :) I've had a friend ask me if I'd do it again... and my reply to that is YES. I would go through all the pain today so I could keep my little girl. I swore to myself that Emberly might just be an only child after everything I went through, but once you hold your very own child in your arms it's the most amazing feeling! I wouldn't change anything!
So that's that. That's the day our little girl was born. I hope I didn't leave out too many details. But for my friends reading this who are pregnant, I hope it doesn't terrify you. If you're getting an epidural, I pray that it actually works. If you do decide to go natural, I know how it feels and have empathy for you! hah

I took Emberly's newborn portraits and plan on posting those on here within the next couple of days. If you're friends with me on Facebook, then I'm sure you've already seen them. Emberly changes more and more each day and is getting more and more beautiful!! I love our little girl xoxo